Shove Thy Neighbor

My commitment-phobic boyfriend of several years is also my neighbor. I resolved to make it work with him and then caught him on FriendFinder exchanging numerous messages with some woman in Tijuana. He claimed he was just being friendly. I asked if he’d correspond with a guy. He responded, “No. I'm not gay.” Humiliatingly, I’ve let him use me for things he can't afford. (He’s been unemployed for two years.) He sometimes showers at his tiny apartment but basically uses it for storage. He refuses to move in with me so we could pay expenses with money his grandma gives him for his rent, but he spends all his time at my place (where I pay for everything). He partakes of my cable TV, Internet, food, and beer, and he even eats food I buy specially for my 9-year-old son. Well, he’s now my ex-boyfriend. As he’s been many times before. What’s with him? Is talking to some random woman on the Internet worth losing everything over?

– Fuming

Feminists have hammered into us girls that we aren’t supposed to sit around dreaming of being rescued by some prince. Somehow, I don’t think the alternative’s supposed to be opting for the mooch neighbor who eats your kid’s food while using your DSL to talk to some chiquita in Tijuana.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Sad but true: A lot of people seem to be perpetually in a state of wanting what they don't have and not wanting what they actually do have. I'm begging you not to be like that in the coming weeks, Aries. Please? I'll tell you why: More than I've seen in a long time, you will have everything going for you if you want precisely what you do have – and are not full of longing for what's unavailable. Do you think you can you manage that brilliant trick? If so, you will be amazed by the sublimity of the peace that will settle over you.

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For the answers, check back on Tuesday, February 7, or pick up the February 16 issue of the River Cities' Reader.

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