|
Lifestyle -
Ask the Advice Goddess
|
|
|
Written by Mike Schulz
|
|
Thursday, 11 March 2010 06:00 |
|
 Things That Go Plump in the Night
I'm absolutely appalled by your response to "Fatty With A Dream," the woman whose boyfriend hasn't touched her in over a year because she gained 40 pounds. Contrary to what you wrote, it isn't unrealistic to expect your boyfriend to be attracted to you after you've gained weight. Also, it was absolutely unnecessary to tell her that she has "put on the equivalent of a 5-year-old child" or that she has gone up "a tent size." I think what needed to be said was this: "Dear FWAD, a woman's sex appeal has more to do with her confidence than her waist size. A woman, no matter what her size, is infinitely more attractive if she truly loves herself and how she looks. If your boyfriend can't appreciate you as you are, he's not worth it. Many men find curves on a woman to be highly attractive and desirable. The more you love yourself, the more others will as well!"
- Voice Of Compassion
It sounds so higher-consciousness to say inner beauty is what really matters, but in the real world, you don't spot somebody at party and want to rip their clothes off because they look like the type to sweep an old lady's walk or read to the blind.
|
|
|
Lifestyle -
Ask the Advice Goddess
|
|
|
Written by Amy Alkon
|
|
Thursday, 04 February 2010 06:00 |
|
Buddy Heat
I was a woman-using jerk in my 20s, but I mended my ways, stopped chasing arm-candy, and sought a relationship with substance. This woman from college supplies exactly what I should want. However, on our first date, she said her last boyfriend cheated on her, and she's "quit playing the game." She's also chosen a lifestyle as "one of the guys," even talking and carrying on like them. (A lesbian soccer team mistakenly invited her to join.) Instead of trying to entice me, she was blunt on date one, challenging me to accept or reject her as a girlfriend. She even put out with no work from me. We do have many shared interests, and started a relationship, but something's missing. Maybe if she'd been more mysterious, a little hard-to-get, I'd be more into her. Or if she'd dress sexy, instead of jocky-frumpy. When I've gingerly addressed these issues, she thinks I'm trying to "modify" her. I guess she has this fairytale script where Superman sweats being with Frumpy Betty because he's "so deep." But I'm not Superman - just a typical dude whose wandering mind keeps getting infatuated with girls who are smiley-cute and flirty.
- Trying
When people ask, "So, how'd you two lovebirds meet?", you don't want them guessing your answer will be something along the lines of "Standing next to each other at the urinal."
|
|
Lifestyle -
Ask the Advice Goddess
|
|
|
Written by Amy Alkon
|
|
Thursday, 07 January 2010 06:00 |
|
 House Swarming
Six months ago, after my boyfriend and I had been together a year, we started living together. We're in our late 20s. Shortly after I moved in, he asked if another couple, his friends, could move in with us so they'd save some money. I said yes - on the understanding that they'd be out by early 2010. My boyfriend soon started hanging with them constantly and ignoring our relationship. I pointed out that we needed our alone-time together. He made excuses, but showed that he had no intention of making time for us. I hid my unhappiness, but finally had to sit him down and tell him what needed to change. Several days later, he said he wanted to take a break, and I should move out - although the problem couple can afford to leave but are using him for cheap rent. He offered to help me move, and into a safe place. I told him I think our situation is fixable with a little effort and understanding.
- Hurt
When you've just moved in with your boyfriend, you should be doing unspeakable things all over the couch, not trying to get on the waiting list for a comfortable seat for Bananagrams.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
