We never imagine ourselves as the victims, but sometimes, the things we think could never happen to us find a way of happening.
Too many of us replay in our minds the events that led to those circumstances, but life coach Teri Johnson believes that reviewing the past isn’t the answer. What we do next is what matters the most.
“All the things you never thought you’d experience, but did, leave behind lingering after effects that can stop us in our tracks,” said Johnson, author of Overcoming the Nevers (www.overcomingthenevers.com). “Shame, guilt, anger and resentment start to sink in. We start to believe lies about ourselves, such as ‘I’m not good enough’ or ‘I’m undeserving.’ We escape our pain and these toxic feelings by retreating into unhealthy behaviors and addictions. But there is freedom from the struggle. There is hope in discovering the truth. There is a way to fall in love with who we are to experience a joy-filled life.”
Johnson shares a solution to overcome those feelings in a series of 12 simple steps that she feels can be practically applied to our lives – if we are ready to do the work. Here are five of the these steps…
• Willingness – Freedom starts with willingness. You have to want this for yourself. There is no one who can decide for you, or do the work on your on your behalf. Willingness is readiness.
• Acceptance – Do you have the strength to make the changes necessary to turn a situation around through an attitude of acceptance? Or will you remain powerless, remain in the state of non-acceptance and let everything around you dictate how you feel? I can’t change somebody else. Period.
• Surrender – All of us are surrendered to something. What we surrender ourselves to ultimately becomes our god, what we worship, turn to, or rely upon. The question is, what are we surrendered to? Is it something firm, solid and long-lasting, or something that can slip away, burn to ashes or be swallowed?
• Courage – We cannot overcome an issue we do not know exists, we need to search. We cannot become who we were created to be, without embracing our strengths and uncovering our God-given gifts and talents. So we need to look through our lives carefully to find the answers. How do we do this? Without fear with courage, boldness and bravery.
• Responsibility – We have a responsibility for ourselves in all areas of our lives in all of our roles. No one can attempt to change us or to control us, unless we give them the power. We need to be the change. Admitting opens this door. Will you walk through it?
“Many people just want a quick fix and aren’t willing to put in the work required,” she added. “I believe that, in this economy, everyone is experiencing ‘nevers’ they didn’t believe they’d ever encounter. Some are affected by the loss of job, foreclosure or even bankruptcy. People who hold down two or more jobs may find their health diminishing, or even joining the ranks of the millions of Americans who suffer from obesity. Divorce, drugs, addictions, workplace issues – they can all creep up on us if we aren’t diligent. The key thing is to understand how to handle those ‘nevers’ when they occur, and not be daunted. It’s never easy, but always worth it.”
About Teri Johnson
Teri is a writer, inspirational speaker, and sought-after personal growth expert. Her unique strategies have helped transform the lives of her clients, enlightening, guiding and motivating them to achieve even their most deeply desired goals. Teri is the President and Founder of Keeping It Personal (www.keepingitpersonal.com), a company that specializes in self-development training and discovering your life purpose.