20 Aug 2012

Old Habits Die Hard: "The Expendables 2," "ParaNorman," and "The Odd Life of Timothy Green"

By Mike Schulz

THE EXPENDABLES 2

If home viewings of The Expendables 2 are one day turned into a drinking game, and I pray that they are, one of the rules has to be that you chug every time the film employs a thudding cliché from the '80s, either directly or indirectly. A plot involving stolen weapons-grade plutonium? Drink! A team of he-men astonished that a new female recruit can actually do something? Drink! Dolph Lundgren wrestling with a Rubik's Cube? Drink twice!

15 Jul 2012

Cold Turkey: "Ice Age: Continental Drift" and "Safety Not Guaranteed"

By Mike Schulz

ICE AGE: CONTINENTAL DRIFT

With Ice Age: Continental Drift, we are now four movies into the apparently never-ending 20th Century Fox franchise, and it might finally be time to ask: Has there ever been a less animated animated lead than Ray Romano's woolly mammoth Manny?

24 Jun 2012

Scottish Rites, and Wrongs: "Brave," "Seeking a Friend for the End of the World," and "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter"

By Mike Schulz

BRAVE

Like many of you, I'd imagine, I applaud Pixar for finally giving audiences a strong female protagonist in Brave, and would've looked forward to the movie itself more had the trailers not been so resoundingly blah. But what I'd forgotten was that several of the animation studio's best outings - Finding Nemo, WALL•E, Toy Story 3 - were also promoted with weak previews, and so it's a pleasure to say that this Scotland-based adventure is one of Pixar's most involving and interesting achievements in years, partly because those generically jokey trailers give you almost no idea of what's actually in store.

11 Jun 2012

In the Beginning ... : "Prometheus" and "Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted"

By Mike Schulz

PROMETHEUS

After many months of speculation, the question of whether Ridley Scott's Prometheus is, in fact, a prequel to the director's Alien can finally be answered: Hell yeah it is. And a good thing, too, because the enticing echoes of that 1979 sci-fi/horror essential are among the scant few elements that truly resonate in this visually extraordinary but only fitfully engaging endeavor.

29 Apr 2012

Prenuptial Agreement: "The Five-Year Engagement," "The Pirates! Band of Misfits," "The Raven," and "Safe"

By Mike Schulz

THE FIVE-YEAR ENGAGEMENT

Say what you will about the current state of movies. Yet in the history of the medium, have the actors who populate film comedies ever been as across-the-board-excellent as they are right now? It took about 20 minutes for this question to pop into my head during The Five-Year Engagement, and once it did, I'm not sure I ever stopped pondering it; from the stars to the supporting cast to the bit players who show up for all of three seconds, director Nicholas Stoller's rom-com features an embarrassment of performance riches. The movie itself? Eh, it's okay.

04 Mar 2012

Demographic Party: "Project X," "Dr. Seuss' The Lorax," and "Flying Monsters 3D"

By Mike Schulz

PROJECT X

In director Nima Nourizadeh's teen comedy Project X, three nerdy high-school pals in North Pasadena decide to make names for themselves by throwing a wild party, and then throw the party.

Now that we've dispensed with the plot, let me try to explain why, through almost its entire running length, this movie made me want to repeatedly plunge an ice pick through my skull.

19 Feb 2012

Mr. and Mr. Smith: "This Means War," "Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance," and "The Secret World of Arrietty"

By Mike Schulz

THIS MEANS WAR

The latest instantly disposable, cinematic-junk-food entertainment by Charlie's Angels and Terminator Salvation director McG is the romantic-comedy action thriller This Means War, and it should be said that the first half of the movie isn't bad. It's closer to excruciating.

22 Dec 2011

Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Loathe Them: "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo," "The Adventures of Tintin,"and "Alvin & the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked"

By Mike Schulz

THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO

Although I haven't read the book and now have no desire to, my guess is that those who love author Stieg Larsson's The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo will likely love the new film version, which boasts exceptional style and (as I understand it) doesn't significantly veer from the novel's narrative. Similarly, those who genuflect at the altar of David Fincher - and I'm occasionally one of them - will find plenty to adore here, as the director's signature imprint is on every seedy, suggestive, sepia-toned image.

04 Dec 2011

Deer Hoofin' It: "Arthur Christmas"

By Mike Schulz

ARTHUR CHRISTMAS

Of the three (count 'em!) family films that opened the day before Thanksgiving, the animated Arthur Christmas initially seemed the most ideal option for younger children, given the nostalgic, in-joke appeal of The Muppets and the melancholia and gravitas of Hugo. Who could have guessed, however, that this frisky, buoyant entertainment might actually be the least appropriate for the grade-school-and-under set? Sure, the bright colors and fast pace will keep the ankle-biters amused, but is there any way they'll register just how freakin' hysterical this thing is?

20 Nov 2011

Bella / The Brawl: "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 1" and "Happy Feet Two"

By Mike Schulz

THE TWILIGHT SAGA: BREAKING DAWN - PART 1

We're now four films into the five-part series of Stephenie Meyer adaptations, and The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 1 is the first one that I wouldn't hesitate to call unpredictable. As someone who couldn't care less about the tortured love triangle involving the human Bella (Kristen Stewart), the vampire Edward (Robert Pattinson), and the lycanthrope Jacob (Taylor Lautner), I was confident that this moody romance would perk up with an added dash of Rosemary's Baby, once the now-married Bella found herself pregnant with Edward's child. (So the undead have living sperm, then?) But how could I have guessed this would be the exact moment that, at least for me, the movie stopped being interesting?

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Old Habits Die Hard: "The Expendables 2," "ParaNorman," and "The Odd Life of Timothy Green"

Cold Turkey: "Ice Age: Continental Drift" and "Safety Not Guaranteed"

Scottish Rites, and Wrongs: "Brave," "Seeking a Friend for the End of the World," and "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter"

In the Beginning ... : "Prometheus" and "Madagascar 3: Europe's Most Wanted"

Prenuptial Agreement: "The Five-Year Engagement," "The Pirates! Band of Misfits," "The Raven," and "Safe"

Demographic Party: "Project X," "Dr. Seuss' The Lorax," and "Flying Monsters 3D"

Mr. and Mr. Smith: "This Means War," "Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance," and "The Secret World of Arrietty"

Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Loathe Them: "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo," "The Adventures of Tintin,"and "Alvin & the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked"

Deer Hoofin' It: "Arthur Christmas"

Bella / The Brawl: "The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn - Part 1" and "Happy Feet Two"

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Tagged Content

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