From child abuse and domestic violence to human sex trafficking and atrocities against civilians in war-torn countries, our world creates new victims daily.

Broken bones and bruises heal, but for many victims, the emotional damage is lifelong and life altering, says Amrita Maat, a nurse, child abuse survivor, and author of the inspirational new book, "Wearing a Mask Called Normal," www.maskcallednormal.com.

"Experiencing abuse can affect how you feel about yourself and how you respond to other people," Maat says. "These effects might be easy to see if you're observing them in someone else, but they can be nearly impossible to recognize in yourself without help."

The emotional and physical abuse that Maat grew up with set the stage for her to become a perpetual victim as an adult, she says. The choices she made and her interactions with others were often unwittingly self-destructive.

"Lifestyle changes that involve healthy choices include eliminating dysfunctional patterns, such as manipulation and abusive behavior - the things children of abusive parents learn from their role models," she says. "A healthy lifestyle comes first through recognizing unhealthy behaviors and then laying the groundwork for positive change."

For Maat, that groundwork begins with forgiveness.

"You have to forgive," she says. "You have to forgive yourself and you have to forgive those who've hurt you. When you're a victim, you're often angry - because you have every right to be angry, right? But anger, focusing on blame and thinking of yourself as a victim only perpetuates the dysfunction and the pain it brings."

So, how does one begin to forgive oneself and others? Maat shares the steps she put together, which helped her learn how to identify what would move her forward on her healing path. She started by creating a list of the people and circumstances she needed to forgive and systematically working through the process:

1. Identify the people who have caused you pain and why you feel that pain. This validates your pain; it was real and deserves to be acknowledged.

2. Identify the pain you feel from others and consciously release it to the universe in a personal ritual that has meaning for you. You might write it down on a piece of paper and burn it. Or speak the words out loud and blow them away.

3. Allow yourself to forgive those who have caused you pain as a means to your physical, emotional and spiritual healing.

4. Identify the people you have caused pain and recognize why you caused them pain. It's important to acknowledge that you, too, are capable of causing pain in order to forgive yourself and those you've hurt.

5. Identify the pain you have caused others with your actions.

6. Allow yourself forgiveness for the pain you have caused others as a means to your physical, emotional and spiritual healing.

While forgiving others for hurt caused intentionally is difficult, Maat says the hardest is forgiving yourself for pain you caused. But this is vital; in order to forgive others and to open yourself to positive energy, you must forgive yourself.

"From every hurtful moment, I learned something, and part of my process is to acknowledge each lesson and to be grateful for it," Maat says. "Forgiveness was possible when I released the hurt because it no longer served a purpose."

About Amrita Maat

Amrita Maat is a nurse who reached a turning point in her life when she was injured while trying to avoid the advances of a physician who had sexually harassed her for years. For the first time, she stood up to an abuser by taking the man to court. But she had waited too long under the statutes, so she did not get her day of justice. Because of the nature of her memoir, Amrita Maat is a pseudonym.

If you're like me and RVs are not an option, then hotels are where you'll be staying over the course of your trip.  Choosing a hotel can be a scary process if you have no knowledge of the area and are working with a limited budget, but using my helpful tips can take out some of the guesswork in finding acceptable hotels.

1. Chain hotels are usually a safe bet (and you could get breakfast for free!). What's the budget for your trip? If you can stay in top-notch hotels with connecting rooms?fantastic. Although I was lucky enough to be able afford that luxury, I purposely chose not to. I wanted my kids to experience "roughing it" a bit so that they would be more appreciative of the luxuries they had at home.  Our go-to spots are moderate-level hotels such as Best Western, Hampton Inn, Holiday Inn Express, and the like. Large chains tend to have a uniform standard of style and cleanliness. An additional perk is that most of these moderate-priced hotels include breakfast. Again, nothing fancy?cold cereals, some breads and pastries, coffee, and fruit.  Sometimes you might get lucky and they'll have a hot buffet.  Everyone loves the make-your-own waffle machine! It's a great way to get something in everyone's stomachs to start the day and you save on the expense of breakfast.  Plus you can grab a muffin or piece of fruit for the road!

2. Do your homework: read ratings, reviews, and phone a friend. With any level of hotel, research is key. I check out websites such as Hotel.com, Expedia, Orbitz, and TripAdvisor, typing in the city to find all the hotels where I'll be stopping so I can compare prices and look at pictures. TripAdvisor is a fantastic resource because you can see reviews and pictures from hotel guests. You'd be surprised at the discrepancy between a hotel's photos and the photos by people who actually stayed there. Some places that look fabulous on the hotel website could actually turn out to be pretty gross in real life!

Before you choose a hotel, look at the location. Do research on the various neighborhoods so that you know ahead of time that you're sleeping in a safe place.  Do you have friends who live in, or have visited, the area? Enlist them! When I was planning a trip to Detroit, I had no idea where to stay (given that almost every hotel had reviews of thefts and other nastiness), so I called an acquaintance who happened to live in a suburb of Detroit and asked his advice. He told me that Dearborn was a nice, safe place for my family. He was right?it was great!  Sometimes friends can tell you what the Internet won't. However, if I don't have any contacts in the area, and there's not much posted online, then my general rule of thumb is that if it's near a popular activity and it's a well-known chain, then it can't be that bad.

3. Make sure your hotel choices are also bed bug free. Another important step in researching hotels is making sure the place you've chosen has not been infested with bedbugs.  Before making a reservation at any hotel, always check the Bed Bug Registry at www.bedbugregistry.com. It is an invaluable resource.  You can look up any hotel in any city and see if there have been reports of bed bugs.  Also, in the event that you encounter bed bugs anywhere you go, please be a good citizen and help out your fellow travelers by reporting it on the site.

4. Let's book it! Once you've done all your research, you're ready to make the reservation. Some hotels and travel sites offer discounts if you pay up front. This option can save you money, but keep in mind that if something comes up last minute, you will not be refunded (even if you have a sob story). However, if you make a reservation and secure it with a credit card, you can usually cancel up to 24 hours in advance without a charge.

I highly discourage you from booking directly through the hotel website or 1-800 number. Compare prices online and call the front desk at the actual hotel. On numerous occasions there was a special promotion going on that wasn't listed online, and I never would have known if I didn't call ahead. Also, the clerk on site can tell you what kind of rooms they have and notate any special requests.

Also to note: it pays to be a AAA member. A membership card can get you valuable discounts on hotels, car rentals, activities, and even at some restaurants.

Another way to get discounts is to join loyalty programs. Enrolling in a loyalty program can be a great way to rack up points if you go narrow and deep with a particular hotel brand.  You can get their credit card and earn points on all your purchases, in addition to your stays, which over time will result in some free stays.  Definitely worth checking out.   Hilton Honors, Marriott Rewards are a couple just to name a few.

5. Print and file. Once you've made your reservation, print out the confirmation and put it in your trip bible for safekeeping.

6. Be ready to think on the fly-sometimes even the best-laid plans can fall apart. Sometimes, even with the best research, you can end up driving to a hotel that is way below your expectations and "just doesn't feel right." As a single mom, when this happens to me, I call the hotel to cancel. I would rather face a cancellation fee than stay in a place where I feel unsafe. Of course, there are ways around the fees, too. Often times a clerk will cancel the reservation just like that.  Other times I've had to get a little creative to avoid the one night charge. Sometimes it might involve a story about my car being stalled or a flight delay, but sometimes the truth works as well.  No one argues with me when I say I am a single mom and I don't feel safe?again, the story you give is up to you.

On our last night in Nashville we booked a very inexpensive hotel near the airport.  It looked fine from the outside but when we drove around back toward our room there were a bunch of drunk guys hanging off the balcony who started whistling and making suggestive comments when I got out of the car.  That was enough for me to go right to the hotel office and cancel immediately.  The clerk totally understood and recommended a few other places for me to check out.

When a hotel just isn't what you expected, the best thing to do is drive around a bit and find where the newer hotels are grouped closed to a few restaurants.  Your GPS can be very helpful with this.  You may have to run in to a few to check prices and availability, but peace of mind is totally worth it.  Always trust your gut?be safe instead of sorry.

Using my helpful tips with take a lot of the guesswork out of finding safe and comfortable places to stay on your trip.  It's not foolproof, but as long as you've done your research, and can redirect on the fly if need be, you will be fine when it comes to booking your stays.  Safe travels!

About Alisa Abecassis

Alisa Abecassis is the proud mother of three children - Lilia, 17; Isaac, 15; and Joel, 14.
After her marriage ended, she decided it was time to strengthen her family's bonds and personal history by traveling and gaining a better appreciation all 50 United States.
Abecassis is a blogger and has a bachelor's degree in political science from UCLA. Connect with her on Twitter @ExploreAll50.

"Age 85 is a bad time to go broke," says expert retirement planner Jeff Gorton.  Personal savings, various investments and, yes, Social Security may prove to be short of what you'd expected.

"Budgeting how you spend money before retirement can often be a misleading measurement of how you'll actually spend it during retirement," says Gorton, a veteran Certified Public Accountant and Certified Financial Planner®, and head of Gorton Financial Group (www.gortonfinancialgroup.com).

"Spending 40 hours a week at work not only earns you a paycheck, it also keeps you from spending money on more vacations, matinee screenings at the movie theater, extra trips to the mall or shopping online. You need to be exceedingly realistic in your planning, and the five years before retirement are actually the most crucial in solidifying post-employment stability."

To prevent a rude awakening during retirement, Gorton makes certain his clients start with a written income plan (WIP). He reviews the benefits and importance of this "living document":

· A comprehensive list of life expenses paints a clearer picture. For a 65-year-old married couple today, there is a 72 percent chance that at least one spouse will live to age 85; a 45 percent chance that one will live to age 90, and an 18 percent chance that one will reach age 95, according a recent study from the CDC National Center for Health Statistics. You may not think of listing things like pet care, yard maintenance, and regular visits to salons or spas. But if you enjoy those services now, you may want them during retirement, and you might find that you underestimated the real cost of maintaining your desired lifestyle. And, that's not including gifts to children and grandchildren!

· The forecast of a two-legged stool. A WIP helps you appreciate the reliability of retirement income. What sources of income do you anticipate having? Traditionally, retirement funding has been viewed as a "three-legged stool," implying a balance between Social Security, retirement plans and savings/investments. As the baby boom generation ages, Social Security benefits may decrease ? and the age at which an individual can collect benefits may increase. Changes in employment may affect retirement plans. As a result, the third leg of the stool, savings/investments, may become even more important.

· Who is authoring your WIP? As with all written documents, you must always consider the source. What you may not realize is that a financial planner is liable to have a stake in selling you a financial product. Just like a retailer may have an incentive to move certain brands of products, many planners are incentivized to have you invest in specific financial vehicles from major institutions. What plan works best for you? Seek advice from an expert who isn't trying to sell you something, such as an independent firm.

"If you don't have a written income plan, then you're just hoping things will work out," Gorton says.

About Jeff Gorton, CPA, CFP®

Jeff Gorton is a Certified Public Accountant and a Certified Financial Planner® specializing in individual tax and retirement planning. He is also an Investment Advisor Representative under Alphastar Capital Management, an SEC Registered Investment Advisor, and has a life and health insurance license. Gorton works with individuals and their families to create and protect their financial legacies. He specializes in working with retirees in the areas of tax planning, benefits, retirement planning, estate planning and safe money techniques. He received his BBA in Accounting from the University of Oklahoma. Gorton previously worked for 10 years as the Chief Financial Officer for a large retail organization, overseeing their accounting, benefits and 401(k) retirement plans.

Myths abound about the subculture of bodybuilding, a sport that took off with the explosion of the health-and-fitness industry in the 1970s.

Back then, the public knew even less about these extreme and dedicated athletes until the release of a breakthrough docudrama in 1977, "Pumping Iron," produced by Jerome Gary and featuring a champion named Arnold Schwarzenegger.

The film has long fascinated Vlad Yudin, writer, director, producer and principal of The Vladar Co., (vladar.com). He has been busy on multiple film projects this year, but right now his focus is the Sept. 20 release of "Generation Iron," created with "Pumping Iron" producer Gary and narrated by Mickey Rourke.

Yudin spent months with the seven bodybuilders featured in the docudrama as they prepared for the Mr. Olympiad contest. He says he came away with an appreciation of how little the public still knows about the sport and the athletes who so compulsively pursue physical perfection.  For one, many people believe bodybuilding is about size - not true.

"It's about developing symmetry," he says.

Here are four myths he says are rampant in literature about bodybuilders, and why they're not true.

• Myth No. 1: Bodybuilders suffer from "negative body image," or "reverse anorexia." Many observers have written that bodybuilders are driven by an eating disorder known as reverse anorexia: No matter how big they get, when they look in the mirror, they still see a skinny wimp. Not true, says Yudin. "The whole point of this sport is to perfect the physique - the goal is to develop perfect symmetry, not to get as big as you can be. These guys are striving for a perfect score in competition. If they see a weak spot, they're going to work on building that up."

• Myth No. 2. Bodybuilders depend on steroids to achieve results. Steroids do not make champions, Yudin says. Bodybuilding champs are athletes so dedicated to constantly consuming the right nutrients on the right schedule and to working out, it becomes a lifestyle. "People think they're just pumping themselves up with steroids, but bodybuilding is a science that requires effort 100 percent of the time, Yudin says.

• Myth No. 3: Bodybuilders have low self-esteem. For some, this may have been true at one point in their lives, Yudin says. Some experienced bullying; others had acceptance issues. But most now have a healthy, even robust, sense of self-esteem. "You can see it in how they carry themselves. They don't do this because of a lack of confidence," he says. "If they did, they wouldn't be able to go on stage and be judged with such intense scrutiny on their physique. They've put in a lot of work and they know they look good." He gives the example of Phil Heath, one of the seven men featured in his film. Heath grew up as a talented athlete and played basketball for the University of Denver. "He started hitting the gym more to train, and became more interested in bodybuilding than basketball," Yudin says. The two-time Mr. Olympia knew he had talent from the get-go and took advantage of it, he says.

• Myth No. 4: Body builders are socially isolated. They get a rap because they dedicate their life to the gym and their diet, Yudin says. They eat every two to three hours and they're in the gym two to three times a day. You just don't see them out and about very often. "But four of the seven men we featured are married. A fifth lives with the mother of his children, and a sixth got married after we stopped shooting. Their family lives are a big part of the film," Yudin says. While he concedes bodybuilders have to be selfish to a degree in order to maintain their grueling schedule, that doesn't mean they're loners who avoid others.

"Branch Warren is a devoted family man who brings his daughter to competitions," Yudin says. "In the film, you see him carrying his daughter through the back stage."

About Vlad Yudin

Russian-born writer, director, producer Vlad Yudin is the principal of The Vladar Co., a media and entertainment production company. New projects include the ARCANA Comics graphic novel and film "Head Smash," and the bodybuilding docudrama "Generation Iron." A second film, "Catskill Park," a horror movie, is also scheduled for release this year. Yudin is currently working with "Game of Thrones" producer Mark Huffam to adapt the historical fiction novel "The French Executioner" for film. He recently published the graphic novel "Head Smash," which will be adapted for film next year. Yudin directed and produced the critically acclaimed docufilm "Big Pun: The Legacy" (2008), and wrote, directed and produced the dark comedy, "Last Day of Summer," in 2009. Yudin grew up in Russia and New York and is a graduate of Pace University and the New York University Filmmaking Program.