21 Jan 2009

Heart Attack: "My Bloody Valentine 3-D," "Not Easily Broken," and "Dolphins"

By Mike Schulz

Jaime King and Megan Boone in My Bloody Valentine 3-DMY BLOODY VALENTINE 3-D

You can assume you're in good hands at a modern horror movie when, within its first couple of minutes, that grizzled, '80s-scare-flick veteran Tom Atkins (he of The Fog and Creepshow and Halloween III: Season of the Witch) shows up as a scowling local sheriff. You pretty much know you're in good hands when the very first thing that Atkins growls, upon finding himself ankle-deep in holiday-themed carnage, is "Happy fuckin' Valentine's Day!" And if, by some miraculous happenstance, you get to watch this seminal genre moment occur while wearing 3-D glasses, to boot... . Well, I've seen better movies than My Bloody Valentine 3-D recently, but bless its forcibly-removed heart, I can't remember the last one that made me feel - in a good way - like a 13-year-old again.

31 May 2005

"Madagascar" Deserves to Be a Hit: Also, "The Longest Yard" and "Millions"

By Robert Jackson Jr.

MadagascarMADAGASCAR

See enough movies, especially ones geared to the younger set, and you all but stop expecting to be surprised by the arc of the plot; our heroes will learn valuable Life Lessons, generally while embarking on A Perilous Journey, good will triumph over evil, the comforts of home, family, and friends will prove more beguiling than any possible adventure, yada yada yada. The joy - the shock - of the new computer-animated comedy Madagascar is that, from scene to scene, you might find yourself having no clue where events will lead, yet you're laughing too hard to pay the matter much mind.

12 Apr 2005

"Fever Pitch" Wins Despite Its Directors: Also, "The Upside of Anger"

By Mike Schulz

Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon in Fever PitchFEVER PITCH

As long as there's a Hollywood, there will be a surfeit of romantic comedies, but when was the last time you saw one that was as charming and magical as it pretended to be? Granted, Hitch made oodles of money, but the platonic love between Will Smith and Kevin James was more engaging than either of their characters' eventual hook-ups, and The Wedding Date, in which Debra Messing and Dermot Mulroney made flirtation look like an act of desperation, was just slightly less romantic than any given episode of Will & Grace.

30 Nov 2004

"Sideways" an Experience to Be Savored: Also, "Being Julia" and "Finding Neverland"

By Mike Schulz

Paul Giamatti and Thomas Haden Church in SidewaysSIDEWAYS

Alexander Payne's Sideways is so chockfull of good humor and emotional accuracy that you leave the theater overwhelmed and a bit giddy; it feels like a movie that you, alone, discovered, and want to share with friends immediately.

16 Jul 2002

"The Road to Perdition" Offers Less Than Meets the Eye: Also, "Halloween: Resurrection"

By Mike Schulz

The Road to PerditionTHE ROAD TO PERDITION

Viewing The Road to Perdition, I didn't much care how the plot worked itself out or how the characters interacted; I just wanted to watch the rain land on Tom Hanks' and Paul Newman's fedoras.

30 Jan 2001

It Must Be January: Collapsing Drama ("The Pledge"), Clichéd Gothic ("The Gift"), and Tired Teen Farce ("Sugar & Spice")

By Mike Schulz

Helen Mirren and Jack Nicholson in The PledgeTHE PLEDGE

Sean Penn is one of the few dependably downbeat figures in American film, and those who like their dramas moody, atmospheric, and richly detailed will get some initial pleasure with The Pledge, Mr. Penn's third directorial outing.

01 Aug 2000

University Profs, University Students: "Nutty Professor II: The Klumps" and "Loser"

By Mike Schulz

Eddie Murphy and Janet Jackson in Nutty Professor II: The KlumpsNUTTY PROFESSOR II: THE KLUMPS

You know exactly what you're going to get out of Nutty Professor II: The Klumps, and for the most part, that's a good thing. As the title indicates, the movie is more spin-off than sequel, as Eddie Murphy gives life to the Klumps, the vivacious and often beyond-vulgar kin to Sherman Klump, the obese genetics professor of the 1996 film.

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