4 Tips for Gaining Perspective on Life's Greatest
Hindrance from Cancer-Surviving Marine

What if you could overcome your fears? What would you do, and how different would you be?

"Most people have no idea of what they're capable of; I think they're almost trained by fear to not attempt the amazing things they dream of. But I'm living proof - if you can overcome fear, you can overcome almost anything," says Jay Platt, whose feats include swimming across the Mississippi River while handcuffed, shackled and blindfolded. He's subject of the new documentary, "Living Unstoppable,"  (www.LivingUnstoppable.com).

Platt was living his dream as a U.S. Marine when a cancer syndrome called von Hippel Lindau (VHL) exploded like a bomb on his life. It caused tumors in his brain and on his spine, as well as kidney cancer and the loss of his left eye.

"I was mad at the world, and maybe part of me was afraid of the fact that I would be considered a handicapped person," says Platt, who was retired from the Marines due to his health.

After a personal journey of acceptance, however, Platt went on accomplish feats many world-class athletes wouldn't consider. Along with his record-breaking Mississippi swim, he swam from Alcatraz Island to San Francisco with his hands and feet tied, and he was one of fewer than 300 people to have hiked the 2,100-mile southbound Appalachian Trail.

He talks about five areas that helped him overcome fear and anxiety in order to rebuild his body, mind and spirit.

• Focus on the joys in life: When you realize it's not all about you, the annoying voice that tells you to be afraid begins to shrivel and loses its poison. While still reeling from his diagnosis and its effects on his life, Platt heard the carefree laughter of a severely handicapped girl being pushed in her wheelchair by her mother. " 'Listen to the birds, Momma,' I heard her say - she was just so happy to experience that simple pleasure," he says. "That, more than anything, sent me on a positive path." His family, friends and those to whom he donates money through various charities gives Platt strength.

• Spiritual preparation: Just as Platt trains physically for his feats, he finds it essential to work out spiritually in order to stand up to the fear and anxieties that life's trials bring. To that end, he surrounds himself with positive messages and positive people, including his friend Les Brown, the influential author of the self-help book, "Live Your Dreams."

• Use setbacks as a motivator: When something bad happens, one of the most common responses is fear - fear that it will happen again; fear that you're less than you used to be; or irrational fear. Platt always knew he'd be a Marine; when he was forced to retire early, he had to recalibrate his entire life. "One of my favorite quotes is 'What are you doing now?' - It doesn't matter what you used to be," he says. Platt is always looking forward to achieving his next goal.

• Remember a greater good: When he started experiencing complications from VHL, which first manifested in his left eye, Platt promised God that he'd devote his life to others if he got through the scare. He has kept that promise - his Appalachian Trail hike alone raised $109,000 for charity. "Staying true to a promise might be the most emotionally solid aid to overcoming fear," Platt says.

About Jay Platt

Jay Platt was medically retired from the Marine Corps in 1998 after suffering complications from the cancer syndrome von Hippel Lindau (VHL), a genetic disease that resulted in brain and spinal tumors, kidney cancer, and the loss of his left eye. When told his future would be considerably dimmer than his past, Platt set out to rebuild himself physically, mentally and spiritually, and to challenge himself by setting demanding physical goals. He was one of fewer than 300 people to have hiked the 2,100-mile southbound Appalachian Trail; one of three to swim from Alcatraz Island to San Francisco with hands and feet tied; and the only person to swim across the Mississippi River while blindfolded, handcuffed and shackled. The proceeds from his adventures and sales of his documentary benefit non-profits, including the VHL Family Alliance.

5 Tips for Getting Off Your Settee & Joining Them

So you're a woman and you want to see the world - on your terms.

Join the crowd!

More and more women are traveling alone or with girlfriends; an estimated 32 million in the past year, according to the Travel Industry Association.

"It's the new trend in travel and, really, it's a no-brainer," says Ruth Yunker, an intrepid solo traveler and author of "Paris, I've Grown Accustomed to Your Ways," (www.ruthyunker.com), a humorous recounting of her extended stay in Paris as part-time resident, part-time tourist.

"Women hold the purse strings, so to speak, and we don't necessarily want to see and experience our travel destinations in the same ways men do."

The numbers tell the story:

• 28 million single women ages 35 and older - a growing demographic, according to the U.S. Census Bureau.
• Earnings for women with a college degree have increased 31 percent since 1979 while men's grew just 16 percent, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics.
• In 2011, 28 percent of married women made more than their husbands, up from 17.8 percent in 1987.

"We value our independence and we have the means to get up and go, so why not?" Yunker says.

If you're a woman who has dreamed of taking off on a safari, jaunting across Europe or sampling fried seahorses in Beijing, Yunker offers valuable advice:

1. So you want to travel. You are dying to travel. You have a list of 10 favorite places you're going to get to ... one day. Buy the airline ticket six months in advance. A non-refundable ticket. Don't fret. Don't get stopped by all the details. Just do it. There. You've taken the first step. You can, and will, worry about all the other details later. But baby, with this ticket, you are now on your way.

2. Bring a few creature comforts from home. I bring my own pillowcase for the airline pillows, my ragged at-home comfy wear instead of new nightgowns for the hotel or apartment, and the clipboard for working crossword puzzles.

3. Pack only clothes you currently actually wear. Do not buy a ton of new clothes for the trip. A suitcase packed with new clothes is a trip doomed to tears, trust me. The old clothes fit you now. You know without thinking how to look pulled together. The new clothes are uncomfortable. They don't go with anything yet. And they scream brand new traveler!

4. Bring some currency from your destination country with you. Do it. Everyone will tell you otherwise. They'll say it's so much cheaper to change your money once you get there. Maybe. But in the mayhem of the airport, suitcases going in every direction, do you really want to be finding the currency exchange? Just getting to the hotel/apartment will be job enough. So do arrive with Euros or whatever currency you need. It doesn't have to be a huge sum, just enough to ease your arrival.

5. Once at the hotel, unpack your toilet articles and arrange them in the bathroom in the same order you do at home. It makes things so much easier. It's so nice to be able to leave the hotel/apartment without having had a meltdown looking for misplaced mascara.

About Ruth Yunker

Ruth Yunker is an author, humorist, columnist, blogger and diehard world traveler. Her peripatetic childhood led to an adulthood always on the move; she has lived all over the United States, from Boston to Los Angeles, Brussels, Belgium and, for a short time, Paris. Her first book, "Me, Myself & Paris," recounts her first experiences as a single woman living alone in Paris for three six-week stints. Her newest book, "Paris, I've Grown Accustomed to Your Ways," continues the saga from a more City of Light-experienced perspective.

Educational Psychologist Offers Tips to Help Schools Help Kids

In a recent interview marking the anniversary of a school shooting that killed two students and wounded 13, the then-teenaged gunman shares the warning signs he displayed before his tragic meltdown.

"My dad noticed my grades slipping ... I would come home with bruises and lie to him," says Charles "Andy" Williams, now 27, in the Oprah Winfrey Network interview.

"I didn't know how to communicate that somethin' really, really bad was goin' on. I didn't know how to talk about it."

Take Andy's story, says educational research specialist Dr. Mariam Azin, and multiply it by hundreds of thousands of students across the country. Among them are the next Adam Lanza, James Holmes, or Andy Williams - people who have become so emotionally disturbed, they turn to killing strangers.

"It's the quiet kids who slip through the cracks and don't get the help they need," says the founder and CEO of Mazin Education (www.mazineducation.com), a social psychologist who has spent decades conducting research in educational settings and on at-risk students.

One high school for which she gathered data found that 750 of its 2,500 students reported having a substance abuse issue. But, in the year she studied, only 10 students were referred for substance abuse intervention, and just five of them connected with a program. Three completed it.

"The loud and disruptive kids who are having problems get the attention they need; the quiet ones don't," Mazin says. "If we can identify them - and we can! -- and intervene, we can help prevent future violence and suicides."

She says schools can take some simple but effective steps right now to begin identifying troubled students.

1. Make it everybody's job. From the lunch lady to the custodian to the bus driver to the teacher, many adults notice small signs, like Andy Williams' declining grades and his bruises. If everyone reported the small signs they saw, the cumulative effect could be one big indicator of a problem. "The cafeteria worker may notice he's not eating," Azin says. "The custodian may see him being bullied. One sign here or there gets overlooked, but if everyone knows that, if they see something that concerns them, they document it, then we'll be able to connect those dots and make sure more kids get the help they need." School leadership should make it everyone's job to report.

2. Provide a safe way to report. Some people say nothing because they're afraid they'll be expected to make a decision about what the behavior means or they'll have to do something about it. Some fear reporting will make them legally accountable. "Everyone involved with students needs to understand they are expected only to report what they see -- changes in behavior, incidents that may cause emotional distress," Azin says. "A single, isolated incident will not necessarily result in action being taken." Schools also need to embed an infrastructure through which concerns can be documented securely as soon as an incident takes place.

3. Identify community services that can help. Schools may be reluctant to identify troubled students because they don't have the resources to provide them with help. "Identify and develop relationships with programs and resources in the community to which students can also be referred," Azin says. "While schools are the place where many troubled students can be identified, it does not necessarily follow that it is solely the school's responsibility to provide all of the necessary services to those students and their families. It takes a village to help provide services to at-risk youth and their families and to help prevent school violence. But if we can't document and clearly identify the need, it's impossible to get these resources in place.

4. Embed a system for follow-up and monitoring. Once students who are showing signs of academic, behavioral, or emotional risk are identified and referred to appropriate services, a system for follow-up and monitoring needs to be embedded to ensure that they actually connect with appropriate mental and physical health services, academic intervention or other family services. Ideally, subsequent monitoring of progress will occur to see if the identified services and interventions are appropriate and producing the intended effects and to make necessary adjustments. "Oftentimes, the way it is now is that schools will make a referral but then it just goes into a black hole - nobody knows what happens afterwards," says Azin.

After a tragedy, Azin says, those who knew the perpetrator recall the signs they witnessed: not speaking to classmates, drug use, bullying.

"People see the signs," she says. "Shouldn't we create a way for them to document that information and get these kids help before something terrible happens?"

About Dr. Mariam Azin

Dr. Mariam Azin is president and CEO of Mazin Education, an educational company focused on software solutions that help schools to better assess, identify and serve at-risk students. Dr. Azin holds a doctorate in applied social psychology and has more than 20 years' experience in educational research and evaluation. She has been the principal investigator on numerous large-scale evaluation efforts related to students, currently serving as joint principal investigator on three federal Safe Schools/Healthy Students evaluations. She is the creator of Mazin Encompass, a software program that helps schools better identify and serve at-risk students.

New concepts are constantly emerging in marketing. We've seen the rise of "green marketing" ? appealing to people's environmental concerns by emphasizing recycled packaging and the like. And mobile marketing, finding new ways to get the attention of potential customers clutching hand-held devices.

There's a lot to be said for new strategies, but it sometimes seems people get dazzled by novel approaches. They forget there's one enduring strategy that never fails.

Honesty.

You can only do so much telling customers and prospective clients about who and what you are. At some point, you have to show them. And if the experience you provide doesn't match with how you've represented yourself, your company, your practice, product or book, they'll not only walk away ? they'll likely take others with them.

There are a lot of ways your honesty ? or lack of it ? can be revealed in the course of a day. Sometimes, it may seem like the price of being honest is just too high, for instance, when you've made a mistake you fear will seriously damage your reputation.
Do you own up to the mistake? Blame someone else? Cover it up?

I like Jason Fried's answer.

Jason is the co-founder of 37signals, a company that produces a chat tool called Campfire for small businesses. A couple years ago, he wrote a column in Inc. magazine about what happened when Campfire malfunctioned, sparking a real wildfire of rage among his customers.

But, he wrote, "People don't judge you on the basis of your mistakes ? they judge you on the manner in which you own up to them."

Jason and his business partner were honest about their mistake, and sincere and consistent in their apologies. They corrected the problem, of course, and also gave their customers a free month of service for the disruption.

By the end of their nightmare, Jason and his business partner were getting messages like this from their customers: "37signals has been giving a free lesson in customer service and honesty the past few weeks."

While I don't believe anyone reading this would intentionally lie to customers or in their marketing, there are many situations that test us! I find it helps to have the rules of engagement firmly in place before a situation arises.

Here are a few good "old-school" marketing strategies:

· Be honest about what you can do - and what you can't. I'm a "yes we can" kind of businesswoman. I've succeeded in business because I know there's almost always a way around an obstacle if you're flexible and creative in problem-solving. I don't back down from a challenge just because it's something I've never done before. However, I also know there are some things I cannot do. Recently, I had a prospective, high-profile client who would've been a dream to bring onboard. In our many conversations, he talked about the kind of publicity he wanted and the general goals he hoped to meet. I knew we would have no problem getting him what he was looking for. But then, just as he was preparing to sign a contract, he shared what he really wanted: His own regular segment on a national network morning show.

To get that he would need more than a publicity campaign, so it's unlikely we could make it happen for him. And I was honest about that. He didn't sign on with us, but, more important, we maintained our integrity and he's not disappointed.

· Keep your word. If you offer a "money back guarantee," honor it upon request. If you say you'll pay a referral fee, pay it immediately. If you say you'll have something done by a certain date, move heaven and earth to meet the deadline. If for some reason you can't, let the customer know, tell them why and be prepared to help mitigate the consequences if possible. (The corollary rule on deadlines is don't promise more than you can deliver!)

· Remember, there's a fine line between attention-getting and trickery. In marketing, the competition for attention is overwhelming, so we draw upon all of our creativity to make ourselves stand out. That's fine. Tricking people is not. In fact, some tricks ? like the old bait-and-switch tactic ? amount to fraud. Others may not have legal consequences but can be just as damaging. (I'm thinking of the congratulatory emails sent out by LinkedIn a couple weeks ago, telling members "You have one of the top 10 (or 5 or 1) percent most viewed profiles for 2012." Many recipients were pleased and rushed to share their exclusive ranking on social media. Many weren't so pleased when the Los Angeles Times reported millions of other members also got the emails.)

It boils down to the Golden Rule for business ? do unto your clients, customers and prospects as you would like done unto you. Sometimes, it requires some really hard decisions. But in the end, integrity is the most valuable marketing tool in your arsenal.

About Marsha Friedman

and she can also be heard weekly on her Blog Talk Radio Show, EMSI's PR Insider every Thursday at 3:00 PM EST. Follow her on Twitter: @marshafriedman.