08 Mar 2015

RoboCrip: "Chappie," "The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel," and "Unfinished Business"

By Sen. Charles Grassley

Chappie

CHAPPIE

The sci-fi-action-comedy-thriller Chappie is the tale of an insentient creature who gains a soul and learns to love, just like Pinocchio and WALL•E and Short Circuit's Number 5. But this is a film by Neill Blomkamp, the writer/director of the violence- and profanity-laden District 9 and Elysium, so don't expect Disney-style warmth or Guttenberg-ian sweetness from this similarly R-rated outing. Instead, prepare to be amazed - though "stupefied" is the more appropriate term - by just how mawkish a movie can be despite boasting a title character who proves expert at carjacking, and whose most frequent malapropism involves his spirited twist on a 12-letter cuss word.

28 Sep 2014

Both Eyes for an Eye, a Jaw for a Tooth: "The Equalizer" and "The Boxtrolls"

By Mike Schulz

Denzel Washington in The EqualizerTHE EQUALIZER

As he did, to great acclaim and an Oscar victory, in director Antoine Fuqua's Training Day, Denzel Washington plays a psychopath in Fuqua's new action thriller The Equalizer. And the most interesting thing about the movie - in truth, the only interesting thing about this laughably earnest, resoundingly foolish endeavor - is that none of its on- or off-screen participants seems to realize it.

25 Aug 2013

Darling, I Love You, but Give Me Park Avenue: "Blue Jasmine," "The World's End," and "You're Next"

By Mike Schulz

Cate Blanchett in Blue JasmineBLUE JASMINE

Woody Allen's new drama Blue Jasmine is modeled, both loosely and very specifically, on Tennessee Williams' A Streetcar Named Desire, and if you're familiar with that stage classic - or, really, with Williams' oeuvre in general - you can correctly presume that the movie will not end on a note of cheer. Yet for the life of me, I couldn't convince my face of that, because Cate Blanchett's almost impossibly fine performance in the writer/director's latest left me smiling so contentedly you would've thought the screening came with an open bar and complimentary full-body massage. Catching up with me on the way out of the auditorium, a friend, regarding Blanchett's portrayal, said, "I think I'm gonna be high for a week." I'm pretty sure I vocalized my agreement but was feeling too high to be certain.

15 Jul 2012

Cold Turkey: "Ice Age: Continental Drift" and "Safety Not Guaranteed"

By Mike Schulz

Ice Age: Continental DriftICE AGE: CONTINENTAL DRIFT

With Ice Age: Continental Drift, we are now four movies into the apparently never-ending 20th Century Fox franchise, and it might finally be time to ask: Has there ever been a less animated animated lead than Ray Romano's woolly mammoth Manny?

03 Jun 2012

Happily Grimm: "Snow White & the Huntsman"

By Mike Schulz

Charlize Theron in Snow White & the HuntsmanSNOW WHITE & THE HUNTSMAN

The first words heard in Snow White & the Huntsman are "Once upon a time ... ," and for the next 125 minutes, the movie unfurls like a malicious, exhilarating fairytale for adults - or a bedtime story for really, really naughty kids. In an age when most screen adaptations of familiar childhood stories quickly descend into camp - either intentionally (Mirror Mirror) or unintentionally (Red Riding Hood) - the intelligence and violence and emotional hunger of debuting director Rupert Sanders' Snow White saga feel utterly welcome, and even somewhat revolutionary. By the film's finale (and I presume this isn't a spoiler), good has triumphed and evil has been vanquished, but the weight of the characters' horrific experiences hasn't been forgotten; it's clear from their serene yet exhausted expressions that while Snow White and her kingdom's subjects get their Happily Ever After, they'll more likely be living Happily, Hesitantly, Ever After.

22 Dec 2011

Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Loathe Them: "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo," "The Adventures of Tintin,"and "Alvin & the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked"

By Mike Schulz

Rooney Mara and Daniel Craig in The Girl with the Dragon TattooTHE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO

Although I haven't read the book and now have no desire to, my guess is that those who love author Stieg Larsson's The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo will likely love the new film version, which boasts exceptional style and (as I understand it) doesn't significantly veer from the novel's narrative. Similarly, those who genuflect at the altar of David Fincher - and I'm occasionally one of them - will find plenty to adore here, as the director's signature imprint is on every seedy, suggestive, sepia-toned image.

20 Mar 2011

Brainy Acts: "Limitless," "The Lincoln Lawyer," and "Paul"

By Mike Schulz

Bradley Cooper in LimitlessLIMITLESS and THE LINCOLN LAWYER

At some point during my double-feature of Limitless and The Lincoln Lawyer, I was reminded, as I frequently am, that we filmgoers don't really need more great movies from Hollywood. We just need more good movies - smart, strong, satisfying releases that only want to entertain, but manage to do so without attempting to overwhelm you, or demanding that you first check your intelligence at the auditorium door.

15 Nov 2009

End-of Daze: "2012" and "Pirate Radio"

By Mike Schulz

Morgan Lily and John Cusack in 20122012

After 2012 - the movie, not the year - it will be exceedingly difficult for Roland Emmerich to deliver yet another of his expensive, apocalyptic disaster cartoons. So, you know, I guess we should be grateful for small favors.

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