24 Feb 2013

The Agony of the Ecstasy: "Snitch" and "Escape from Planet Earth"

By Mike Schulz

Barry Pepper, Susan Sarandon, and Dwayne Johnson in SnitchSNITCH

As a film star, Dwayne Johnson possesses a lot of gifts - or, at least, sufficiently impressive gifts for what his résumé has required. Though God knows he's physically intimidating, Johnson is also our most thoroughly genial of ass-kickers, with even his most violent of big-screen endeavors leavened by a welcome lightness of touch and hint of amused self-mockery. And as he has proved in all those bland family entertainments over the years, Johnson still manages to appear game and committed in movies that don't deserve his considerable charisma, often salvaging entire scenes through unexpectedly silly gestures or readings that show just how inventive a comedian he can be. (I was happy for 10 whole minutes following his brief channeling of co-star Michael Caine in Journey 2: The Mysterious Island. They were about the only 10 minutes during the movie in which I was happy.)

05 Aug 2012

Really, Really Secret Agent Man: "Total Recall" and "Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days"

By Mike Schulz

Colin Farrell in Total RecallTOTAL RECALL

Beyond its rather stunning scenic design, the best thing about director Len Wiseman's new Total Recall update is Kate Beckinsale, which is pretty surprising, considering that this admittedly capable, inarguably gorgeous performer really hasn't been the best thing about any of her previous movies.

22 Mar 2010

Roman's Holiday: "The Ghost Writer," "Diary of a Wimpy Kid," "The Bounty Hunter," and "Hubble 3D"

By Mike Schulz

Pierce Brosnan and Ewan McGregor in The Ghost WriterTHE GHOST WRITER

Calling Roman Polanski's The Ghost Writer "lighthearted" isn't entirely accurate, as the movie is a moody suspense thriller concerning high-level government conspiracies, and its color palette seems to shift only from gray to very dark gray. Then again, this is a Polanski film we're talking about - coming from the man who gave us Rosemary's Baby, Repulsion, Chinatown, and The Pianist, it's practically Gidget Goes Hawaiian.

09 Aug 2009

Joe Blow(s): "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra" and "A Perfect Getaway"

By Mike Schulz

Sienna Miller in G.I. Joe: The Rise of CobraG.I. JOE: THE RISE OF COBRA

Anticipating that the movie would suck, a friend extended a challenge prior to my screening of G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra: Try making it through the whole movie without thinking of Team America: World Police.

06 Apr 2004

Gentler Smith Fails to Score with "Jersey Girl": Also, "Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed," "Home on the Range," and "Shattered Glass"

By Mike Schulz

Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler in Jersey GirlJERSEY GIRL

Theoretically, there's nothing wrong with Kevin Smith momentarily eschewing his predilection for what he terms "dick and fart jokes" in favor of more honest, heartwarming fare, but good God, don't we Smith fans deserve better than Jersey Girl? In previous films, Smith presented us with a woman who screws a dead man, the Almighty in the personage of Alanis Morissette, and a lesbian who switches teams for Ben Affleck, yet I found his latest work the least believable in his oeuvre, a movie so brazenly phony and audience-pandering that I wanted to hide my face.

09 Oct 2001

Stiller Finally Gets His Breakout Comic Role: "Zoolander," "Joy Ride," and "Serendipity"

By Mike Schulz

ZOOLANDER

Those of us who've been waiting, in film after film, for Ben Stiller to hit the comedic peaks he reached on his short-lived TV series The Ben Stiller Show might find Zoolander pretty irresistible.

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