12 Sep 2010

The Blunder Years: "Flipped," "16 to Life," and "Resident Evil: Afterlife"

By Mike Schulz

Madeline Carroll and Callan McAuliffe in FlippedFLIPPED

Rob Reiner's 1986 Stand by Me told us that we'll never have better, more meaningful friends than the ones we had when we were 12. His new film, Flipped, tells us that we'll never have better, more meaningful romances than the ones we had when we were 12. It's touching, if a little sad, that it's all apparently been downhill for the director since hitting his teen years, but does Reiner's nostalgic yearning somehow excuse his latest for being so bland, saccharine, and childish? Set just a few years after Reiner's summer-of-'59 hit, Flipped is like Stand by Me without profanity, dirty jokes, unforced camaraderie, and Kiefer Sutherland. In other words, it's just a stone's throw away from utterly excruciating.

06 Sep 2010

The Too-Quiet American: "The American," "Going the Distance," "Machete," and "The River Is Life"

By Mike Schulz

THE AMERICAN

There's so much that's impressive about The American that I feel somewhat guilty for briefly nodding off, twice, during the course of the film. But in my defense - and unlike the gentleman sitting in the row ahead of me - I'm at least reasonably sure I didn't snore.

29 Aug 2010

Devilish Fun: "The Last Exorcism," "Get Low," and "Takers"

By Mike Schulz

Ashley Bell in The Last ExorcismTHE LAST EXORCISM

For the majority of its length, The Last Exorcism is a hell of a good time. I'd love to say that's because the movie is terrifying, but it isn't, really; the biggest jolt you're likely to experience comes in the first 20 minutes, when a teen unexpectedly hits a car's rear window with a rock. Yet until it goes seriously off the rails in its final third, director Daniel Stamm's low-tech scare flick is clever and engrossing (without being all that gross), and it boasts a protagonist who's something unique for his genre: a funny, friendly sort whom you're still aching to see get what's coming to him.

25 Aug 2010

Kings of the Hills: "Restrepo," Opening Friday, September 3, at Rave Motion Pictures Davenport 53

By Mike Schulz

scene from RestrepoRestrepo would be supremely noteworthy even if it weren't a documentary on modern warfare in Afghanistan that somehow found its way to a Quad Cities cineplex.

22 Aug 2010

Gone to Seed: "The Switch," "Eat Pray Love," and "Nanny McPhee Returns"

By Mike Schulz

Jason Bateman and Jennifer Aniston in The SwitchTHE SWITCH

Since it's a romantic comedy starring Jennifer Aniston that actually doesn't suck, it's temping to overrate The Switch, which opens with Aniston's Kassie preparing to be artificially inseminated, and BFF Wally (Jason Bateman) - who secretly loves her - swapping her sperm donor's donation for one of his own.

22 Aug 2010

Jaws. Lots and Lots of Jaws: "Piranha 3D," "Clary Illian: A Year in the Life," and "From the Badlands to Alcatraz"

By Mike Schulz

Jerry O'Connell in Piranha 3DPIRANHA 3D

Alexandre Aja's Piranha 3D puts you in the unexpected position of actively rooting for the piranha, not because the effects are all that great (they're actually pretty awful), but because more flesh for the fish means fewer irritating humans to put up with.

15 Aug 2010

Ex Men (and a Woman) United: "Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World" and "The Expendables"

By Mike Schulz

Michael Cera and Mary Elizabeth Winstead in Scott Pilgrim Vs. the WorldSCOTT PILGRIM VS. THE WORLD

Is there any working film director who adores actors more than Edgar Wright? I ask this after recently viewing (for maybe the sixth time) the British helmer's action spoof Hot Fuzz and (for maybe the millionth) the untouchable zombie satire Shaun of the Dead, comedies with the rare distinction of being populated entirely with sharp, funny performers; even the walk-ons - or, in Shaun's case, the lurch- and stumble-ons - are charismatic. And after seeing the director's latest, Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World, I think a wholly reasonable case can be made for Wright being the best friend that anyone with a SAG card and a dream could ever hope for. You could fill 110 movies with the joyous onslaught of personality on display in this movie's 110 minutes.

09 Aug 2010

Happy Feet / Glum Defeat: "Step Up 3D" and "Charlie St. Cloud"

By Mike Schulz

Step Up 3DSTEP UP 3D

From its opening, outdoor melee, in which we're assaulted by soap bubbles and multi-colored balloons, to its jaw-dropping dance-off finale, which suggests a mass seizure titled Attack of the TRON Clones, Step Up 3D is proudly, even profoundly, ridiculous.

09 Aug 2010

Beat(en) Cops: "The Other Guys"

By Mike Schulz

Mark Wahlberg and Will Ferrell in The Other GuysTHE OTHER GUYS

I'm not going to pretend that I understood the crime plot in director Adam McKay's The Other Guys, which concerns Wall Street chicanery, bureaucratic red tape, a pension-fund swindle, and a suicide or a murder, though I'm hesitant to state exactly which. Seriously, when did goofy-ass Will Ferrell comedies get so complicated?

01 Aug 2010

Guess-Who's Coming to Dinner: "The Kids Are All Right" and "Dinner for Schmucks"

By Mike Schulz

Annette Bening, Julianne Moore, Josh Hutcherson, Mia Wasikowska, and Mark Ruffalo in The Kids Are All RightTHE KIDS ARE ALL RIGHT

In general terms, explaining what director Lisa Cholodenko's The Kids Are All Right is "about" is a pretty easy task: 18-year-old Joni (Mia Wasikowska) and 15-year-old Laser (Josh Hutcherson) - the children of a contented and devoted lesbian couple (Annette Bening's Nic and Julianne Moore's Jules) - arrange a first meeting with their shared sperm-donor father (Mark Ruffalo's Paul), and through several more meetings, watch as his casually disruptive presence gradually, irrevocably alters their family dynamic. Yet while this is an accurate, if simplified, plot synopsis, it doesn't come remotely close to explaining what this buoyant, original, altogether extraordinary dramatic comedy is actually about.

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