THE THEORY OF EVERYTHING

After being released in larger markets several weeks ago, the Stephen Hawking bio-pic The Theory of Everything has finally landed locally. For those of you who loved the trailers, it's probably going to be exactly the warm, touching, inspirational romance you were led to expect. For those of you who rolled your eyes at the trailers, as I did, it's probably going to be exactly the banal, formulaic, desperately Oscar-bait-y domestic drama you feared it might be, and perhaps even worse.

"I always feel like, in terms of my career, I'm a little bit behind," says singer/songwriter J.M. James, whose public concert as a Quad City Arts Visiting Artist takes place on December 12 at Davenport's Redstone Room. "You know, it wasn't like I was writing songs and singing at 18. I didn't have a band in high school, I wasn't a 22-year-old trying to get my music out there ... . I didn't do my first solo gig with my own stuff until I was, like, 27."

Music

Christmas at Augustana

Centennial Hall

Friday, December 5, 8 p.m., and Saturday, December 6, 4 p.m.

An Ambrosian Christmas

Christ the King Chapel

Saturday, December 6, 7 p.m.

Augustana College's seasonal celebration Christmas at Augustana, showcasing numerous students from the school's choirs, will be held on December 5 at 8 p.m. and December 6 at 4 p.m.

St. Ambrose University's seasonal celebration An Ambrosian Christmas, showcasing numerous students from the school's choirs, will be held on December 6 at 8 p.m.

You know what that means, right? There's no need to choose between these events at institutions separated by a river - they've been scheduled so we can attend both! It's like the Christmas truce of World War I all over again! And exactly 100 years later, to boot!

As someone who's been privileged to write about local theatre for nearly 10 years now, I can't begin to describe the sheer tonnage* of correspondence I've amassed from people who are curious about upcoming area stage productions. Please allow me, then, this attempt at answering all your questions about the forthcoming winter-theatre season through just a few of the hundreds** of letters, e-mails, and texts I've recently received on this subject***.

*Perhaps an exaggeration.

**Definitely an exaggeration.

***Some of which I may have made up.